The Male Gaze, Expectations, Psychology of Play, Magick, and Leading a More Fulfilling Life for 2017

Do you wish on candles? Blow dandelions and make a wish? Do you gaze at the first star and make a wish? Do you write your intentions down in church and pop into the intention box for prayers? Do you use a journal to write your goals?

Well, it’s now heading into 2017 and time to make some intentions but this time you will have a bit of magick and psychology on your side.

This is open to anyone. You don’t need to be a Wiccan, a prophet, or a psychotherapist. Just be open-minded, have fun while you do this ritual/process and bring your emotions to it. Show up!

The Male Gaze and Magick

Have you ever been out and been the subject of a chap gawking at you? Why does it make you so uncomfortable? If we voice it, people (mainly men, will say, ‘He’s only looking.’ But we all know it’s more than that. We can feel ‘it.’ And this, my friend, is the power of expectation. They expect something of you, and it is palpable. Have you ever been subjected to a long and uncomfortable conversation with someone and yet you can’t turn away? It’s because they expect a long conversation. So, we must bring this power of expectation into our life. Expect your spell/goals/intentions to work.

Psychology, Magick, and Play

In order to live your best life you need to have boundaries, show self-care, know what you want from life and what you don’t want. Sometimes this can take years to build into your life. This is where magick can help. Rather than grasping at these psychological terms you can use the ritual/process of magickal thinking to internalise it. Just as a child uses dolls and teddies to play out dramas; They use this play to learn and make sense of their world. And we, as adults, can use candles, anointing oil, full moons, salt circles, lists of intentions and goals to learn and internalising their true meaning. That meaning is using our emotions, what we wish to attract into our lives, and a ritual to play this out in the physical plain so we can internalise it. If we internalise this ritual/process (which we can as we "played "it out and we understood why we wrote our intentions, why we use the candle oil, why we chant, and brought our emotions to visualise what we want as already having it) This can propel us to action thereby helping us to make decisions to design our best lives.


The Importance of Play

As my role as a teacher, I soon learned the importance of play. In the child’s world play helps to give them a sense of their abilities, talents, confidence at carrying the ritual/process out thus making them feel good about themselves. As play is fun and engaging, children become absorbed in it thus leading to an almost meditative state of concentration. And this is where the magic happens. If you want to know more about this Google Concentration and the release of hormones – it releases feel good hormones!


Finally, Emotion

Did you have a favourite song as a teenager? One of mine was Radiohead’s Creep. It made me feel alive. That even the song was sad and the video depressing there was a strange honesty to it and that is what made it so beautiful. I felt like I could take on the world. I wanted to move to London and hang out with people like the singers. But now, as an adult, I would rather live a life that I designed that is cool on my terms. Not just being a passive participant groupie hanging in the background. And that is what all of this is about. Digging out what is inside of you and making it a reality, no matter of age, creed, location, or sex.

Just like Music reaches into the depth of your soul and enlivens you so too can magickal process. Gather your tools; a candle, Fleet and Flower candle oil, a pen and paper, write what you want but phrase it as if you have it and then chant/visualise and rub the candle oil into your candle with a heartbeat that any drummer would envy. 

In short, you need that depth to put in that candle. You need your feelings to be poured into that candle.